Thursday, July 26, 2012

For our partner ceases to be Perfect With Time


No doubt in love is a feeling like no other. Everything around us is wonderful, our partner is perfect and we are elated but what happens when time passes and that feeling disappears and is no longer so perfect that person.

Some time ago a friend gave me a book "Love with your eyes open" by Jorge Bucay (doctor, psychotherapist and author of several successful works) which I found quite interesting. Here through a story and his partner Jorge Bucay Silvia Salinas made a reflection on the sense of being a couple and the true meaning of love.

The conclusion reached is that we all need to create us a mask to protect us from the outside world, to hide our weaknesses and thus be accepted and loved by others. But at the same time also hide our true selves and have just identified with that mask we create.

What happens when we fall in love? As we are liberated unconsciously that shield or coat and showed us just as we are facing each other, this causes the feeling of exhilaration and liberation. But the time for fear of being rejected by the other person does not say what we really think or act like we would really create that shell again. All this becomes frustration and reflect on our partner thinking it's the other part that is closed in the relationship.

Interestingly, it is studied, that when we do this "move" the problem the other person see that away from us (no more than a projection of how we move ourselves), then we also put through land .

For example, a woman who is afraid of being abandoned, every time you feel that your partner is away a little reproaches, saying, See how I do not want, you always leave me alone?. If at that time was taking a little distance on a temporary basis, making these accusations is that it reinforces that attitude he took at the time, is overwhelmed and eventually leave.

Simple as that to end it always happens the same and that neurosis is always ends with the abandonment confirmed.

People shape their relations with an idea of ​​what will happen and behave as if this was really happening until they get it to happen.

It is true that a couple has to agree on everything to be compatible, simply to show no fear as you are, accept as your partner and not try to change for change that maybe if you do not like to like to stop the all.

In short, the acceptance of the couple that makes us free and happy at the same time.

Article prepared by the team http://www.citaunica.com

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